The woman who does the announcements for the London Underground was canned (or made redundant, I believe) for posting fake announcements on her website. Check some of them out here and imagine how much more fun life would be if some of these were tossed out over the intercom every once in awhile.
And admit it, you’ve always wondered what she looks like and how she’d sound saying “Take me rhino-style, big boy!” No? Not even once? Okay then.